There are people in this world, most in fact, who toil through their humdrum existence with little reach outside the periphery of their familiar surroundings. And then there are those who impulsively thrust their bodies into random situations for the sole purpose of the experience that will inevitably fill the well of curiosity toward further tantalizing teases of possibilities.   

One of these rare participants is Davey Dabs. 

In his absurd stratosphere of rationale, that which fluctuates between the calm, enlightened space of gratitude and hairbrained feats of stupidity, is an understanding that without context, life is a sequence of guesses and assumptions mostly leading to inaccurate determinations of fact. And in his relentless pursuit of accumulating knowledge through participation, it is clear to him that no person has ever prevailed at every attempt made toward succeeding. 

“Wins and lessons,” he likes to pontificate to those who doubt his process. “There are no losses,” he extends, “because each perceived failure is actually an incredible part of creating who you are meant to become.” These words are choked out in a massive cloud of exhaled vapor while visible swirls of broken sunlight peek through the venetian blinds. “There’s not a CEO in this country who hasn’t failed at least once in life.”

With an avocado mask covered face, these are the last words before he draws a second full gram dab of rosin before politely standing to excuse himself from the table. He proceeds to drop his robe and takes to the sauna for a “chicken bake” with a brewing belly of 1000 milligrams of RSO. He will meditate in the suffocating heat for thirty minutes much like Moses himself, transcending consciousness in the face of the burning bush. 

His brown body is covered with jet black hair—bunches of it bulging from the edges of his speedo. 

By the way, Davey Dabs’ favorite thing to eat from Costco is the Chicken Bake.